Written by Terence Gilbey, CEO of the Findhorn Foundation

Today it is stormy outside. The rain is hammering a steady rhythm against the roof and I can see the trees bending as they are buffeted by the wind. I just watched someone walk by, their shoulders hunched against the cold and their head bowed low against the weather. They looked miserable and wet. Seeing them highlighted for me how grateful I am for the quiet, comfort, and warmth of my office – where I feel protected and safe.

*A wild and rainy day on the Isle of Erraid.*

Isn’t it interesting how the turbulent weather outside can be such an apropos metaphor for how we might be feeling mentally and emotionally on the inside? With all that is happening in the world, it does feel as if we are in a sort of ‘perfect storm’ of disruption and ever-accelerating change that is buffeting us from all sides. (1) I certainly understand why people say that they are feeling overwhelmed, disenfranchised and afraid, and why platitudes are no longer enough to be comforting. There is a growing sense that the gravity of our current context is transforming humanity, just as a big winter storm can remake the landscape. That is a lot to digest.

If you have been struggling of late, you may be able to relate to how difficult it can be to stay open and optimistic during times of trial, when defences are triggered and the ego is working overtime to defend and protect us from all that is happening. I know first-hand how easy it can be to start to churn on worrisome thoughts and projections, falling into a pattern where disappointments lead to ever greater disappointments, ultimately becoming persistent feelings of discouragement, sadness, anger and/or numbness.

Where are you? – ‘above the line’

…or ‘below the line’?

In their book, The 15 Commitments of Conscious Leadership (2015), authors Diana Chapman, Jim Dethmer, and Kaley Klemp introduce a very simple, visual tool of a basic, ‘straight line’ to help people describe how they are responding to what is occurring in their life and their overall sense of ‘being’.

“Through the news and social media we are besieged by a constant flow of messages and images that reinforce fear, uncertainty, shame, division, unworthiness, unfairness, and dishonesty.”

According to their model, when we are ‘above the line’, we are feeling open, curious, and committed to learning; we see all people and situations as our allies, take full responsibility for ourselves and adopt an expansive, growth mindset. The energy above-the-line is expansive and generative.

In contrast, when we are ‘below the line’, we are closed, reactive, and committed to being right. From below the line, we perceive life and relationships from a place of scarcity (there isn’t enough of what we desire – time, resources, recognition, etc.) and are quick to blame others, feel the victim of circumstance, and fear worst-case scenarios. The energy below the line is very constricted, the emotions are heavy and reactive, and the mindset is fixed – so it is difficult to envision and create new possibilities from this place.

Sadly, it seems that much of the rhetoric and behaviour surrounding us in today’s world is located squarely below-the-line, so choosing to be above-the-line can feel particularly arduous. Through the news and social media we are besieged by a constant flow of messages and images that reinforce fear, uncertainty, shame, division, unworthiness, unfairness, and dishonesty. And then, unfortunately, once we are below-the-line, it is that much harder to see any possibilities for change. This further entrenches us below-the-line, creating a demoralising, downward cycle that feels bad and leaves us stuck – not liking where we are, but feeling unable to change it.

What about we simply gain enough awareness of ourselves so we can recognise and accept ‘where we are’ in relation to the line – emotionally, psychologically, relationally, spiritually – and if we are willing to shift. So I would ask you, “Where are you in this now-moment?”

Are you feeling above the line or below it?

Are you being thrashed by the storms in your life, or sustaining a sense of peace and possibility amidst the storms? Are you able to find joyful moments, even in the chaos, or are you deeply craving the missing spark of vitality, hope and optimism that feels just out of reach?

How to move ‘above the line’

Turning within

If you are below-the-line, have hope! The good news is that there IS a way to calm the storms in our lives and move above-the-line. Even better, it is an ‘inside job’, as they say. Rather than trying to tackle all that is beyond our control, we focus on changing what we DO control in our lives, and that is our inner landscape – our thoughts, beliefs, emotions, perspectives and actions. In doing this, we can change our reality.

As Vernon Howard, the 1960’s American spiritual teacher, author and philosopher wrote:

“The outer storm ceases the moment the inner storm ends, for they are the same storm.”

Therefore, we do not have to feel we are the victims of circumstance or resign ourselves to being miserable. If you are feeling the brunt of the moment and have fallen below-the-line, the key to finding peace in your life is to turn inward. By going inward and seeking connection with ourselves, each other, nature, and Spirit, we can find freedom and be an island of peace in the midst of upheaval.

In this way, we can find serenity.

To be in serenity is to be free of mental stress, anxiety, agitation, uneasiness, alarm and discontent. It is a grounded, peaceful state of being. As the common saying goes,

“Serenity is not freedom from the storm, but peace amid the storm.”

And the Serenity Prayer itself highlights the potential we have when we actively take responsibility for ourselves, direct our thoughts, and choose where to put our focus. It teaches us about personal power, faith, discernment, and the strength found in knowing how much of our lived experience is within our control. (2)

“God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.”

Actively interrupting our patterns

Yet, even writing and believing all of this, I know from personal experience that it can be a challenge to shift out of a negative spiral. It’s not always easy to admit to myself when I am below-the-line, and even harder to recognise that the misery I may be feeling at any moment is the result of me holding onto my own drama, limiting beliefs and coping mechanisms. Sometimes, when I am squarely below-the-line, I get so caught up in my inner storms that I lose sight of the knowledge that I am in control and that I can change. And even worse, unconsciously, I might cling to my shame and anger, while also yearning for a relief from it.

“We recognise that to create the outcomes we want in our life, we need to shift and find new ways to think, do, feel and be.”

When I find myself falling into this pattern, the best way to get out of my demoralised and limited thinking is to actively interrupt it. Sometimes an interruption is all I need to shift the momentum and get back to a more creative, expansive, and hopeful place.

In organisational development there is a change model that was originally popularised in the 1940s by physicist and social scientist, Kurt Lewin. In it, Lewin teaches that in order to embrace and adapt to change, a person (or organisation) must experience an interruption to help them to "unfreeze” from their existing patterns, ideas and processes. We all get frozen sometimes.

When we are stuck in our fixed thinking, buckling under the weight of too many commitments, triggered into flight/flight/freeze responses and disempowered by what we see as unchangeable, we are below-the-line and unable to transform and grow. By “unfreezing” ourselves, we recognise that to create the outcomes we want in our life, we need to shift and find new ways to think, do, feel and be.

*Snowdrops breaking through last year’s leaves*

What we can offer

At the Findhorn Foundation, we believe that the way to quiet the storms and to move back into love and freedom is to turn inward and connect to our heart and our inner wisdom. As we explored in our article, Attunement and the Power of Inner Listening, when we are below-the-line, awash in reactivity and negative emotions, we become distanced from our heart and disconnected from the vitality, peace and love that is available to us when we connect to our inner selves, to each other, to nature and to Spirit.

It is through practices such as meditation (3) and gratitude (4), and opening to awe and the present moment (5) that we can begin to shift our inner landscape and move above-the-line.

Join our online meditations on Zoom

If you could use a daily reset in your life, we encourage you to join our daily meditations.

And even more, as we explored last month in our blog, New experiences can change your life, doing something new and different can “break the debilitating cycles of worry and powerlessness, stretch time, and create greater peace and presence in our lives.”

Research suggests that new experiences enhance well-being, increase happiness, stimulate the brain, boost confidence and reduce stress. And even more, the anticipation of a future positive experience will begin the process of transformation by helping you to see the good in your life, feel energised, feel more empowered, and have a renewed sense of purpose. (6)

Join our island experiences

If you are needing a bigger, more fundamental ‘interruption’ to help you to unfreeze and break out of limiting, below-the-line patterns, then consider joining us for one of our in-person immersive experiences in Scotland.

Whether you journey to the quiet spirituality of the Spirit of Iona retreat, or immerse yourself in our small-group Erraid Experience Week (or maybe combine the two!), we can guarantee you will view your life, and the potential of it, differently after your time with us.

As a child, I would often hear reference to a proverb about the weather when the month of March would arrive. People would say, “In like a lion, out like a lamb,” to describe how the weather would change and soften over the month.

For this month of March, I encourage you to set a goal to calm the inner storms of your life, find ways to stay above-the-line by interrupting the negative cycles, and open to the peace and love inside of you that is ready to frolic like the lambs in the sunny springtime fields.

Begin your transformation now

Go here to book your spot: Spirit of Iona retreats and our newly launched, Erraid Experience Week.

(1) I’ve heard from so many people how they are feeling increasingly overwhelmed by uncertainty and anxiety as they witness political upheaval, climate change, the ticking doomsday clock, failing medical systems, looming pandemics, environmental disasters, rising costs, emerging mental health issues, the proliferation of artificial intelligence (and its potential to displace people) and a growing distrust of information. While they themselves struggle with managing their own experiences of emotional disconnection, fractured relationships, illness, unresolved traumas, fatigue and technology dependency.
(2) Attributed to Reinhold Niebuhr. The version quoted here was published in 1951. See discussion of the Serenity Prayer here: Shapiro, Fred (2008) Who Wrote the Serenity Prayer, Yale Alumni Magazine; Shapiro, Fred (2014), How I discovered I was wrong about the origin of the Serenity Prayer, USCatholic.org.
(3) “Resiliency and Inner Work,” Findhorn Foundation newsletter, November 6, 2024.
(4) “An Attitude of Gratitude,” Findhorn Foundation newsletter, December 3, 2024.
(5) “It’s About Presence, Not Place,” Findhorn Foundation newsletter, July 5, 2024.
(6) “The power of positive anticipation,” Addictions Training Institute.

Spring is building and new possibilities emerge